Finding Freedom in The Trash
So you want to loose some weight? That's a valid desire given our cultural desire for thinness. Just curious, what do you hope to gain from weight loss?
Since we all live in a weight biased, fat phobic culture. You're surrounded by motivators (read shame triggers) to control your weight, to push your body toward an unrealistic ideal of what your body *should* look like to be healthy.
Regardless of your where your motivation for weight loss comes from, your experience is valid. I get it.
And yet, sorry to say, but...loosing weight doesn't automatically guarantee you any of those falsely promised ideals. The dreamy marketing images for beach resorts. The empowering woman standing before a large attentive audience. Or the lovers looking longingly into each other's eye in a lustful gaze.
Wait, there's hope! Here's a twist...all of those ideals *are* possible for you!
Just recently, on the 4th of July, a client sent me the above photo and caption. By throwing out her scale and no longer trying to shame herself thin, she's regaining freedom that years of dieting have stolen from her.
Imagine how much time you'd have back in your life if you gave up your, weight loss tactics? Time that could be spent meeting new people through a hobby, enhancing your self confidence by learning a new professional skill, and generally learning to find peace in your here and now body.
Learning to create your version of those cultural ideals, in your here and now body through self compassion and intuition - that's what we call body liberation friends!
Here's a simple activity to help kick start that learning process...
- Toss the scale in the trash (smash and trash is a favorite of many!) This includes body scales and food scales.
- Make a list of all the things you've been waiting to do until you're thinner
- Break that list down into categories such as professional, personal, activities/adventures, food, movement, etc. Feel free to use other categories that pop out at you as well as you read through your list of desires.
- Add you desires to each of the categories. Down below each list in each category, brainstorm what skills you may need to gain or what critical self talk you may need to challenge or what resources you may need to seek out in order to make those desires a reality.
- Now brainstorm what barriers are holding you back from reaching out for any of the above. Here you may add in weight since that is a valid part of your experience. But I invite you to dig deeper - what else besides weight
is holding you back?
Finally, is there someone you trust that you can share these thoughts with? Someone who can listen and hear you (not always the same thing BTW) describe your desire to live life more fully, with freedom from the stress of constantly pursuing weight loss. This can also be helpful to do with a Health At Every Size (R) informed therapist or dietitian Together, come up with an actionable plan to help you find the freedom you seek. You absolutely deserve to live the life you desire regardless of your weight.
Cheering for you!!